This, then, is the amount of dollars that I dropped today for four books, four of which I do not want. While it is true that I could have gotten two of them for half price online, I didn’t want to wait for them to ship and so I just bit the bullet, bent over, and grabbed my ankles. The fortunate part is that for two of my classes I don’t need the books, so I didn’t have to buy them. The unfortunate part is that tuition went up and so my scholarship check, used to pay for things like a good raping at the campus bookstore, is three hundred dollars less, almost the exact amount of money I got screwed out of today. The good news, though, is that now I have a job. The bad new is that now I have to work.

Hey, speaking of job, I still don’t know what’s going on. My boss told me that he was going to have the previous rep spend some time with me when I got here to help get me trained. I emailed the old rep and he was like, “Sure, we can meet for dinner.” However, I was also under the impression that he was going to handle back to school, the Most Important Time of the Year, Ever. He said that he wasn’t a rep any more, so he wasn’t handling anything of the sort. This leaves me high and dry, with zero idea of what the hell I’m supposed to be doing, when I’m supposed to be doing it, or even where I’m supposed to be doing it. This is what I have been led to believe is a classic case of salesman training, wherein, in the words of my ever-applicable brother, your training consists of, “Okay, you’re hired. Here’s the keys. GO!” In the words of my ever-applicable father, I’m all up on my horse and ready to go, but I have no idea which direction to ride off in.

And I just got screwed for $327.85.

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